Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
