Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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