piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Randomize
