You just made me feel so damn special
I'm drive I can fine osifer
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
