p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
