We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
