I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
this will be a night to untag.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
