Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
