If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
