before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
