didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I think people are normalizing furries
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
