question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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