we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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