grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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