i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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