Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
