girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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