Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
