No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
