I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
