i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize