its not stalking. its research.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize