i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
