I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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