his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
