porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
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