I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
