On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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