im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
