I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize