he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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