do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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