glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
