i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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