the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
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