Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My Higher Power is John Stamos
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize