Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
