So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize