We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
