Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
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