i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
