It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
