super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
