their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize