Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Randomize
