so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
