Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Randomize
