I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
