at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
