After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
