Non-Jews are for practice
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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